wa such a dream

hee

so me... cannot do one thing at one time de

So it took me to work from 1130pm to 5+am for my presentation and still like doing lor. Alot more to go...

When management dun even know wat they want how m i to satisfy them? anway m paid so if need RA RA i got to bah..

But so hilarious haaaaaaa know wat? i actually dreamt i snap at my D.

e scene....
it was sunday. I went back to collect some notes for my presentation and saw D. He said nothing. The plan was to go back collect notes then watch movie with dear. But when i am about to leave office, my D told my new boss i need to finish the ppt by 3pm But my show is at 3+ lei. Then very unhappy i snapped at him. If he said early i can readjust my schedule u noe haaa it was such tense moment...

Jus now morning msn chat with HC. He told me to zzz so i get inspiration to complete my ppt but told him dun wan to zzz wait i dream i stab my D. LOL

Slept about 5+am and woke up 8.30am. But managed to zzz abit more and catch Doraemon. Today's one luckily i have never watch before so quite amused by the toys Doraemon used to help Da Xiong. hee hee.. u noe last time to be able to watch this cartoon is sth luxury cos always have events on weekend....

so i still consider lucky bah.. even now to do ppt get wack then still dun noe how to start from .. it is better than a working robot.. but deep inside i noe that period i got more satisfaction than now.

有得必有失？

din mean it de

it is always bad to affect ppl especially during party time.

Have holding on cos need to bring you all in. I was by then very tire and see partial stars already.

Stupid low RBC making me have sudden attack... by the time going for 2nd time toilet, climb up the stairs i already knoe cannot hold on de.

So left silence mah

How i noe then he also left same time

now at home, too exhausted

我是一颗酸梅

甜中带酸

哈哈

怀念不久的甜蜜

我怀念的是无言感动
我怀念的是绝对炽热
我怀念的是你很激动
我怀念的是无话不说
我怀念的是一起作梦

怀念不久的甜蜜

我怀念的是无言感动
我怀念的是绝对炽热
我怀念的是你很激动
我怀念的是无话不说
我怀念的是一起作梦

不想睡

雨后的城市寂寞又狼狈
路边的座位它空着在等谁
我拉住时间它却不理会
有没有别人跟我一样很想被安慰
风停了又吹我忽然想起谁
天亮了又黑我过了好几岁
心暖了又灰世界
有时候孤单的很需要另一个同类
爱收了又给我们都不太完美
梦作了又碎我们有几次机会去追
不晓得为什么爱又稀少又昂贵
云在半空中被微风剪碎回忆
也许美可是正在飞走对不对啦啦...
天亮了又黑我过了好几岁

不想睡

雨后的城市寂寞又狼狈
路边的座位它空着在等谁
我拉住时间它却不理会
有没有别人跟我一样很想被安慰
风停了又吹我忽然想起谁
天亮了又黑我过了好几岁
心暖了又灰世界
有时候孤单的很需要另一个同类
爱收了又给我们都不太完美
梦作了又碎我们有几次机会去追
不晓得为什么爱又稀少又昂贵
云在半空中被微风剪碎回忆
也许美可是正在飞走对不对啦啦...
天亮了又黑我过了好几岁

no output

hmm

it is like stain n not fountain.

so not me again!

dun noe tmr will be able to pull out sth or not

but din really wan cos wanna go clubbing n sweat it out again mah
but if dun have it meant sth not rite again

12 july goin to take my scan results and do another RBC count test.

:( u noe i m v upset by Blood bank. they turned me away now keep send notice ask me go donate blood! arrgh not i dun wan mah

so how how how? if my RBC go back to 12+ i can go donate le? no need wait another 6mths mah since they keep send me notice.

can go back so fast? rem after 1 mth my RBC went up by 0.1 heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Gosh, is this mangojo?

wa so not assertive, so not aggressive.

she has changed or she aged?

stay calm n jus allow the flow to go on

guess ex colleagues will be shocked at how wormy i m now

lol

to fight or to flight?

Haiz

i dun mind the work 'honeymoon period' over.

But cannot stand the unreasonable treatment.

First by the D who not only fickleminded but forgetful. And according to tips and what i see, the typical old chinese mgr style.

Then HR fucking attitude.

Was not allocate the 'rightful' seat n now wan me to keep shifting. Already told them that if want me to shift, get my network and phone up at the new station. But no one bother and it is jus so coincident ppl keep asking y i m sitting here!

The work is funz n meaningful but many many irritating issues recently with mgmt.

However those who know me well that i will fight for justice be shock that i jus simple put my head down n remain silent.

Recently health is not good. Very bad. Wait vomit, nausea, giddy etc. I dun wan to challenge myself too much again. Jus wan peace.

So it's a struggle, to fight (which i noe i will win glorifying in a way cos will be able to prove my capability further) or to flight and then perhap settle for a more admin nature job?

haiz

here likethat, that also like that.

arrgh

sometimes it jus hard to accept fact

Back to reality too fast?

cannot take it ?

maybe bah

Cannot dun believe my ill fate haaaaaaa

sounds so self pity lei

dun like

but reality set in too fast.. maybe also faulty to enter into dreamland so like that bah

lalalalalalallalala

if keep dwelling, it become i m adding stress. I noe that!

how now? mango is rather a stubborn person one lei.... she still need time to convince herself 'it is like that one lah'

at meanwhile, run away virtually...

go ard aimlessly

maybe the other way rd is to freeze in the fridge bah

if each day can be less than 24 hours

heehee

then i can work less hours n zzz longer? n less tire?

though had dinner tonite with GRLs and supposed to be R&R i felt tire throughout. now even but as usual refuse to zzz early..

tmr meeting at town then need rush down to SP.

tire tire tire

N staff all so brainless n useless

human r greedy

we human r greedy lots.

tend to take and possess and too quick to ask back when thing slip out of hand...

recently a friend's spouse asked to come back after this friend served a divorce notice.

the spouse walked out many yrs ago w/o even telling my friend what is wrong. Left big shit for my friend including finanical.

After years, my friend decided to serve e paper since spouse never even turn back.

We dun noe wat cause the split. but the spouse chose to run away to faraway land n not even willing to settle what was left behind is really...

anyway

the spouse actually reverted and plead to reconcile. After all these yrs?

if the spouse has always wanted and regretted for own doing, would this person made more efforts than to email n tell my friend wanna to come back?

human r jus greedy. Do not wan to lose sth that is in hand, not even rots.

tat goes to my marriage. I felt ex hubby still somehow think he possess me. So he can continue to order me to do things. Doing things for friend is ok, it is the attitude. Cant stand him jus wan me 24 hours standby and die for him.

He has packed and left quietly aft stormy days. maybe this time i m too firm le lah, tat y he noe he wont be able to command me like before.

took this pic of an empty cupboard.
human r greedy
damages are left to the weaker ones

glad my friend firmed up mind. I mean it could sound v harsh on the spouse but sometimes what step u took u can never undo do..
walk with care, friends

u noe wat is worst than being diagnose with incurable illness?

that doc said 'dun noe y'.

N there you go time to time get feverish, emit alot of heat and yet temp on thermometer showed u r perfectly ok. Then you get giddy spell. then you seem to be out of world cos u cannot concentrate.

But doc said 'dun noe y'.

Ytd morning vomitted in bus. Dear said it should be gastric fluid. But i noe definately caused by the Iron tablet.

So now phobia of taking another trial. Cos it is not onloy about vomitting but the torment moment before u throw up....

Now feeling giddy. Lucky boss not in.

how long can i sustain like tat?

:( i would rather being diagnose with cancer or watever terminable illness u noe! will stop playing catchign with doc le.

My mum being suffering from bad giddy spells since her 30+, i m worried. Cos when she was down, this daughter took up job and responsible for whole family. So even when she lost her hubby, there is solution. If i am down and like her cannot work anymore, who is goin to take care of this family and me? nobody.. cos bro will said God will help him.

who is the God that worked hard n long hours to get more for family all these years?

who has yet to get enlightened and still preach that one cannot work too hard.

everything this mango does is wrong wrong wrong.. but she is still benefiting everyone..

tat goes to ex hubby. Ytd he lectured me that i dun noe how to deal with life. Felt i m a joke. M i so bad! if so, all these yrs, who is the one giving him moral support and never leave him in lurk?

MANGOJO is jus one of those jokes in this world, wasting resources.

But life has to go on as long as one is breathing, be it weak or refreshing one...

Life MUST go on cos there are too many unfinished businesses to take care of.

Making myself sound impt? maybe..

hahaha

tat's life, folks!

blow aft blow

As expected, medical results is 'it is still low'. 'Maybe ... er... let's see...'

Then monster came back.

Had big fight over the phone this morning. Tried to off it and then evengin kena again. It is about 1hr + that he is lecturring, maligning and insulting me :(
still goin on now....

life is HELL. 4 letter words

夜

Very irritated tonite.

Boss is unfair or stereotype PA staff as brainless n tactless. So he jumped into conclusion on sth on me even it was not my fault

Then i tried to take bus home. But bus broke down half way.

Managed to take a cab. but towards reaching my place, driver realised he din on meter. So we settled on an amount i m unsure if it is fair.

At door, a lizard just happily stuck to door n i had problem opening the door. Now my gate is not locked cos unsure if lizard is there.

Feeling lousy.
可是亲爱的，你怎么不在我身边
。。 以前的他没空里我。
现在也许年纪还小，爱莫能助。 也不想让他人感到承重的负担。。。

life u still need to face it n walk ahead alone de :)

天天都有落叶 特别是今晚夜当沙沙的风吹 每一片叶 掉一滴泪夜夜有人心碎 他们相信谁当爱被解了约 作何感觉

当世界被感情蒙上一层灰而我 宁愿是最后的落叶

nothing

cant help but still wanna to blog.

At this hour hee hee.

Ytd was a scarey nite. The weather was so fine but the moment i went home reached the corridor, thunder roared. N there i saw that same pair of man shoes at the stairs.

Well, that pair of shoes was there for so long le. Only that fear triggered when Edward joked if i hear footstep at night...

Had dinner with Edward & Nick. Edward was kind to come n fetch me. Used to be Nick but since now we are far apart Edward has to be the one haaaaa ( but i think he feel happy to do it than if i get licence and drive ard haha). He is still not familar with this area and kept asking me how to get to PIE haha.. he enjoys talking to himself bah cos i really road idiot.

We had jap food and then ice cream. Then Edward was fast to delegate Nick to send me home as i took alot of Jap food+wasabi+sushimi+sake+ice cream+ uncooked waffle. Hahaaaaaaa they scare i leave a trail u noe wa lau.

The sudden thunder, strong wind and rain really caught me off guard. Really got scared. Din even dare to go and bathe. Took me awhile to do that. thanks to someone on line wiht me for awhile. After bath, played facebook. recently hooked on the bubble words. Then quickly ran back to bedroom on all the lights & Tv & radio, read book and fell asleep ;)

life goes on........

This is nothing maybe compared to tmr when he is back from China. He is moving his things out. But should be staying for say 4 days. Maybe lesser cos some nites he be dun noe whr with who (like i care). But when there is contact time, war may start anytime u noe lol

Arrgh... dun noe lah, i have to fill in my time slots. Maybe sat night go n find ppl to drink n drunk bah haiz 你不在当我最需要爱。。 haaa so crap me. No lah, jus that now the song is playing so i tot so timely LOL. Nevermind de, last time i also live with it. Now i think i still can. No matter what must give respect to the 1st occupant mah

dum dum di di lalalalallalalalalalalalalala

mangojo back in action...

cos she is plain lazy to own another blog n then keep forgetting password. N she still wanna to keep a blog but will fliter wat's in n out.

Happiness ard

PAsians are having quite good news recently.

Cheryl has given birth.

Heard Lecia is going to soon.

Then our little used-to-be rascal Princess is going to get married ;) Really this little gal has grown up over the years. She has gone through some tough road before and now i am really happy for her in finding her dar. This guy really dotes on her :)))

I wish one day i have such good news :)

人生和爱情原本是简单的。
人的自私和贪欲往往伤了别人也伤了自己。
谁比谁好
谁比谁美
一瞬间的诱惑
终生的遗憾
自食其果

后悔遗憾自责，留给你
希望永恒无悔，送还我

living in this world for 32 yrs
alot of things i still dun noe.

y ppl knoe n i dun noe dun noe dun noe

learnt to smile for sake of others (tat the only thing life force n endow me with?)

dun noe how to stay true happy
dun noe how to create happy happy mood
dun noe how to make other happy
dun noe how come keep makign ppl unhappy
dun noe y i cannot bring happiness to others

moving out

realise that something said is not really wat was meant.

unwittingly intrude other's privacy.

Cleaning up the mess now.

gonna to shift 'house' again.

let selected folks noe..

turning cold le