We live for a purpose. That is what usually a succesful person will say. With a purpose, there will be meaning and efforts are deemed effortless.
I used to be pretty hard on myself. At least that's what i thought it was.
Personal growth, i strive to get educational certificates. Every pass and graduation make me feel fulfilled and will stronger. Cos i was able to exceed own limitation and broke the curse or rather the bad trend in my family tree (both parents' sides). Under almost impossible climates, i got the fundamental certificates. And was happy and really glad. That to some it seemed so trivial and thought i was weird. Everyone has different set(s) of obstacles to overcome. I am destined to go through the unusual path in order to achieve something which seemed so naturally to possess.
Looking back and into current, have made a serious mistake in career move. Amist all the encouragaement to leave a hell workplace, i forgot something most important. This weirdo works on anything merely because of passion. Yeah, with passion, obstacles can be overcome w/o pain. So now i find myself drifting because i cant find back the passion. It is almost impossible, but true, that i want to work on something that at the same time benefit people at large. That is because, when i was at the brim of life, nobody extended help (but i do appreciate what the church has done for my whole family. The Church handed us some monthly $ so that i was not as taxing to provide for entire family expenses)
So, now what can i do to progress in career? it is not only stagnant but almost put to a stop cos of stupid health issue. But i do not want it to be an end. I cannot afford. And yeah i m hungry for alot more. Because i strived very hard and got what i had, i want to prove to myself that i can do better despite limited IQ and capability. I need to show a good example for my younger brother.
How do i break the current barrier and progress..
Love / Relationship is the worst part of my life. The past showed i was such a failure. This current one i am not sure how to make it progress. Thanks to say that currently there is trust and alot of understanding. However there must be more efforts or how can a relationship substain and even progress? W/o new progress, alot of unhappy things will happen. That is why we see couple of many years eventually break up even before marriage. Married couples are just together for sake of status and some for children. With now things are fine, how can i bring this relationship to newer height?
Maybe i am really shallow. Definition of progress is so limit. But i need to try and strive harder. Progress is something no one can run away from it.
Ponder and ponder. Who and where can i learn to be smarter and view things more wholesome n intelligently?
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