It has not been easy for me to get ppl to watch the type of movie i like... long, slow unfolding story with alot of twists n alot of academic air in it.
Youth w/o Youth is a movie that can trigger craze in me to attempt to understand it deeper by reflashing many of the scenes, the dialogues, read on reviews & author & his other works and to spend big bomb on getting the book to read again to fully understand the ending. I jus need to put a perfect ending to it!
The Thursday's afternoon in picture house, seated with so few people ard. Serenity, lazy Thursday with a plot half known to me.. n great companion that shared my curousity and put up with my 1001 questions.
That Thursday marked 25 Sept 2008
Cheers
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Panick! Restarting......
A letter to u...
We have not known too long so u wont understand what happen..
N like others, u also think that i quitted my job cos i cannot take my boss stupidity
How to explain to u?
NO NO NO
Ppl who worked with me know me well. I have went through alot of hardship and challenges at work and even life. Nothing was plain sailing for me.
But i never gave up entirely.
My fighting spirit was always high.
this time i panicked.
It is my health. Ppl like you who are healthy wont understand.
I panick n panick even more.
It is ok if bosses give hell. Cos no brainer like her cannot do damage to me. It is ok if Director's demand is high and can be sarcastic.
It is NOT okay when my mind cannot work. The tremendous drop of blood cell count reduce my ability in concentratio and thinking. Did i not share with you that at one seminar, i simply turn blank?
Mum's has such giddy symptom when she was 30s. there will be days she cannot even get up.
I did not and have not been thinking i will suffer that too. But after several times esp. a simple 2 stop MRT ride can really wipe my energy off, i m scare n worry.
Ppl who know me know that even up to today i m the sole breadwinner at home. I cannot afford to be like my mum. Nobody can support me.
It is a painful struggle for me to leave workforce and not work for another who' know how many months.
Am alrady getting tire of answreing ppls' qn on why quit, so jia lat meh etc. Dun take me as a joke. It not fun
If really there is a need, i ought to give up everyting. And come back again whne i m up there again. Some human r dangerous. they onlybe attractd to u when u r there. when u r down, they will add salt to the wound
I am pushing that 'restart' button in anyway.
We have not known too long so u wont understand what happen..
N like others, u also think that i quitted my job cos i cannot take my boss stupidity
How to explain to u?
NO NO NO
Ppl who worked with me know me well. I have went through alot of hardship and challenges at work and even life. Nothing was plain sailing for me.
But i never gave up entirely.
My fighting spirit was always high.
this time i panicked.
It is my health. Ppl like you who are healthy wont understand.
I panick n panick even more.
It is ok if bosses give hell. Cos no brainer like her cannot do damage to me. It is ok if Director's demand is high and can be sarcastic.
It is NOT okay when my mind cannot work. The tremendous drop of blood cell count reduce my ability in concentratio and thinking. Did i not share with you that at one seminar, i simply turn blank?
Mum's has such giddy symptom when she was 30s. there will be days she cannot even get up.
I did not and have not been thinking i will suffer that too. But after several times esp. a simple 2 stop MRT ride can really wipe my energy off, i m scare n worry.
Ppl who know me know that even up to today i m the sole breadwinner at home. I cannot afford to be like my mum. Nobody can support me.
It is a painful struggle for me to leave workforce and not work for another who' know how many months.
Am alrady getting tire of answreing ppls' qn on why quit, so jia lat meh etc. Dun take me as a joke. It not fun
If really there is a need, i ought to give up everyting. And come back again whne i m up there again. Some human r dangerous. they onlybe attractd to u when u r there. when u r down, they will add salt to the wound
I am pushing that 'restart' button in anyway.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Cooking for health
Been reading books on health.
Diet and food nutrition is one of the essentials.
To cut down calories and carbo for a much energised me, i have now start to be cautious of what i eat and how the food r being prepared. One other important factor is to save money. Nowadays either u find even hawkers up price or down on portion. And not forgetting the irritation of paying high service charge @ resturants and yet the food & service r below standard! Hence cooking for myself is so much happier, cheaper and healthy.
Very simple dishes such as mere steam fish, imperial chicken (pre-packed herbals) and desserts make good nutritious meals.
Trying to reduce intake of white rice. Sweet potatoes is good alternative.
From a book, i was reminded that my intake of water is really low. Many ppl ard me commented that. Yeah, i do not drink alot. At most per intake is few sip of water. One time i tried to drink more n actually puke water out. Now slowly trying to increase drinking water.
Water is too precious for our bodies :)
Diet and food nutrition is one of the essentials.
To cut down calories and carbo for a much energised me, i have now start to be cautious of what i eat and how the food r being prepared. One other important factor is to save money. Nowadays either u find even hawkers up price or down on portion. And not forgetting the irritation of paying high service charge @ resturants and yet the food & service r below standard! Hence cooking for myself is so much happier, cheaper and healthy.
Very simple dishes such as mere steam fish, imperial chicken (pre-packed herbals) and desserts make good nutritious meals.
Trying to reduce intake of white rice. Sweet potatoes is good alternative.
From a book, i was reminded that my intake of water is really low. Many ppl ard me commented that. Yeah, i do not drink alot. At most per intake is few sip of water. One time i tried to drink more n actually puke water out. Now slowly trying to increase drinking water.
Water is too precious for our bodies :)
Friday, September 19, 2008
Ytd
First day damn bad cramp.
As could not do my daily exercise due to cramp, tried to walk to interchange and take bus. At least that 5 - 10 min walk can sweat it out...
Everytime was fine until cramp + giddy attack came by when i tried to buy some food from fairprice.
It took me abt 15mins hiding in toilet due to cramp and urge to puke.
Then at the bus stop i was totally unable to move much. Managed to sit down, sweat jus broke; the cramp was terrible.
At 7pm+ the crowd was bad with only one bus taking us back to punggol. Hesitated to go up bus since it was overcrowded. In fact, let go 2 buses. The thought of me puking in the bus with 10s of ppl was not fun. Wanted to take cab but worry to got into bad smelling ones or one driver that like to brake n brake. That will give me more problem. At that point, every step has to be taken into consideration as already see stars; can blackout anytime.
SMSed but the other side was too busy having gathering. Actually also cannot do anyhting mah, i undeerstand lah haa. But jus need some encouragement to get me back home. So vulunerable.
Pray n pray and managed to get into a bus that was not so crowded. Indeed prayer got heard :)
In the bus, was further lucky to be able to get a seat. Continue to pray that i wont faint or puke in the bus.
It was only about 20min ride but it seemed forever.
Reached home, i thank Buddha for giving me the strength and protection. Took the last pink pill (again, prayer heard) and after an hour or so, the pain subsided.
Wonder if it is due to weaken body or as i grow older, my pain endurance lessen? the monthly biz pain is getting bad to worst
As could not do my daily exercise due to cramp, tried to walk to interchange and take bus. At least that 5 - 10 min walk can sweat it out...
Everytime was fine until cramp + giddy attack came by when i tried to buy some food from fairprice.
It took me abt 15mins hiding in toilet due to cramp and urge to puke.
Then at the bus stop i was totally unable to move much. Managed to sit down, sweat jus broke; the cramp was terrible.
At 7pm+ the crowd was bad with only one bus taking us back to punggol. Hesitated to go up bus since it was overcrowded. In fact, let go 2 buses. The thought of me puking in the bus with 10s of ppl was not fun. Wanted to take cab but worry to got into bad smelling ones or one driver that like to brake n brake. That will give me more problem. At that point, every step has to be taken into consideration as already see stars; can blackout anytime.
SMSed but the other side was too busy having gathering. Actually also cannot do anyhting mah, i undeerstand lah haa. But jus need some encouragement to get me back home. So vulunerable.
Pray n pray and managed to get into a bus that was not so crowded. Indeed prayer got heard :)
In the bus, was further lucky to be able to get a seat. Continue to pray that i wont faint or puke in the bus.
It was only about 20min ride but it seemed forever.
Reached home, i thank Buddha for giving me the strength and protection. Took the last pink pill (again, prayer heard) and after an hour or so, the pain subsided.
Wonder if it is due to weaken body or as i grow older, my pain endurance lessen? the monthly biz pain is getting bad to worst
Monday, September 8, 2008
请自己相信人间还是会有希望的
everyone has up n down.
Some like to pour sorrow, some like to jus in peace to overcome it..
maybe the some is me
there is such agony on deciding to quit or not.. $ is always a matter. But health vs money, wat do i say?
nevertheless ppl who heard commenting unncessary. If really if it is not such a bother, do not think i will give up so easily on this job. This job is soooo simple yet still has its social meaning to me.
Tire already.. wat e hack..
朋友，请容许他人有自己的空间和烦恼
您的无理取闹，这时候的我无法包容
请您在这时间，享受自己的快乐
让他人安静的好好的面对自己的问题
我无能也不要求谁为我分担痛苦
只是要你们知道，我会在一次走出阴暗
到时候，请给于一个微笑
有时友谊就是这样更坚强
嘻嘻哈哈不是全部
静静的陪伴，让友情落地生根，卓见成长
Life, there must be other way out when someting is changing
There will be will be
Some like to pour sorrow, some like to jus in peace to overcome it..
maybe the some is me
there is such agony on deciding to quit or not.. $ is always a matter. But health vs money, wat do i say?
nevertheless ppl who heard commenting unncessary. If really if it is not such a bother, do not think i will give up so easily on this job. This job is soooo simple yet still has its social meaning to me.
Tire already.. wat e hack..
朋友，请容许他人有自己的空间和烦恼
您的无理取闹，这时候的我无法包容
请您在这时间，享受自己的快乐
让他人安静的好好的面对自己的问题
我无能也不要求谁为我分担痛苦
只是要你们知道，我会在一次走出阴暗
到时候，请给于一个微笑
有时友谊就是这样更坚强
嘻嘻哈哈不是全部
静静的陪伴，让友情落地生根，卓见成长
Life, there must be other way out when someting is changing
There will be will be
Monday, September 1, 2008
haiz
wat to say.. jus abit sad sad bah...
even u dun understand n remark that...
pls lor.. ppl is being nasty to me..
haiz nvm, u have own view ...
i should always let ppl say de
even u dun understand n remark that...
pls lor.. ppl is being nasty to me..
haiz nvm, u have own view ...
i should always let ppl say de
tongues wage
hmm so maybe the work from home cannot work liao .. cos ppl r not happy.. one by one came n suan me hmmmmmmm
see how bah
no lose also if to leave entirely
see how bah
no lose also if to leave entirely
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